Sen. Sam Brownback (R-Kansas), now a candidate for governor of Kansas, has been spending too much time with his iPod Weird Laws app. And now he has a brain fart. He wants to have an official state Office of the Repealer. Seriously.
It is not that there aren’t some inane laws on the books. There are (as I will illustrate in a moment). In nearly every state, at every level of government, from sea to shining sea, our body of laws need serious revision. For one thing, Virginia has yet to remove its anti-sodomy law from the books, even though the US Supreme Court struck down such laws. And you know the Cooch is just itching for a fight on that one. But that law is only the tip of the iceberg. A sample includes:
• In Sarasota, FL, it’s illegal to sing while wearing a bathing suit.
• In Fl it’s illegal to skateboard without a license.
• In Miami, FL, it’s illegal to imitate an animal.
• In FL, women can be fined for falling asleep under a hair dryer, as can the salon owner.
• In GA, it’s illegal to change the clothes on a storefront mannequin unless the shades are down.
• In Idaho, no frowning in public is allowed.
• Idaho it’s illegal to ride a merry-go-round on Sunday.
• In IL you can be arrested for vagrancy if you do not have at least one dollar in your wallet.
• In IL it’s illegal to be broke.
• Also in IL it’s illegal to hum on public streets on Sunday.
• In Gary, IN, it’s illegal to eat garlic within 4 hours of going to the theater. (Uh, Oh.)
• Iowa: If a man has a mustache, he cannot kiss a woman in public.
• Kansas: It’s illegal to sell cherry pie a la mode on Sunday. (Someone had a sense of humor.)
• Kansas: No musical horns allowed. (Someone didn’t like Music Man?)
• In MA, snoring is prohibited unless all windows are closed and locked.
• In MA Mourners at a funeral may not eat more than three sandwiches.
• Minn says it’s ilelgal for women to impersonate Santa Claus (30 days in jail).
• In New Jersey it’s illegal to frown at a police officer.
• It’s illegal in NY for a woman to be on the street wearing “body hugging clothes.” (which kinda gives license to arrest more than half of all women.
• It’s illegal in NY to give someone the “high” sign.
• It’s illegal to flirt in NY (heh).
• And in Charlotte, NC we have our very own Taliban law: Women must have their bodies covered with at least 16 yards of cloth at all times.
• And in Youngstown, OH, it’s illegal to run out of gas.
Well, OK, so I have spent way too much time with the Weird Laws app myself. People who live in glass app houses should not cast stones, huh? So, I am horrified to admit that I actually also think some weird laws should be repealed. The only trouble is that Brownback is trying to politicize the control of any review of obsolete laws.
PS: This is an old law which should stay: In GA it’s illegal to start a false rumor.