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Sen. Brownback and Weird Laws

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Sen. Sam Brownback (R-Kansas), now a candidate for governor of Kansas, has been spending too much time with his iPod Weird Laws app.  And now he has a brain fart.  He wants to have an official state Office of the Repealer.  Seriously.

It is not that there aren’t some inane laws on the books. There are (as I will illustrate in a moment). In nearly every state, at every level of government, from sea to shining sea, our body of laws need serious revision. For one thing, Virginia has yet to remove its anti-sodomy law from the books, even though the US Supreme Court struck down such laws. And you know the Cooch is just itching for a fight on that one. But that law is only the tip of the iceberg. A sample includes:

• In Sarasota, FL, it’s illegal to sing while wearing a bathing suit.

• In Fl it’s illegal to skateboard without a license.

• In Miami, FL, it’s illegal to imitate an animal.

• In FL, women can be fined for falling asleep under a hair dryer, as can the salon owner.

• In GA, it’s illegal to change the clothes on a storefront mannequin unless the shades are down.

• In Idaho, no frowning in public is allowed.

• Idaho it’s illegal to ride a merry-go-round on Sunday.

• In IL you can be arrested for vagrancy if you do not have at least one dollar in your wallet.

• In IL it’s illegal to be broke.

• Also in IL it’s illegal to hum on public streets on Sunday.

• In Gary, IN, it’s illegal to eat garlic within 4 hours of going to the theater. (Uh, Oh.)

• Iowa: If a man has a mustache, he cannot kiss a woman in public.

• Kansas: It’s illegal to sell cherry pie a la mode on Sunday. (Someone had a sense of humor.)

• Kansas: No musical horns allowed.  (Someone didn’t like Music Man?)

• In MA, snoring is prohibited unless all windows are closed and locked.

• In MA Mourners at a funeral may not eat more than three sandwiches.

• Minn says it’s ilelgal for women to impersonate Santa Claus (30 days in jail).

• In New Jersey it’s illegal to frown at a police officer.

• It’s illegal in NY for a woman to be on the street wearing “body hugging clothes.” (which kinda gives license to arrest more than half of all women.

• It’s illegal in NY to give someone the “high” sign.

• It’s illegal to flirt in NY (heh).

• And in Charlotte, NC we have our very own Taliban law: Women must have their bodies covered with at least 16 yards of cloth at all times.

• And in Youngstown, OH, it’s illegal to run out of gas.

Well, OK, so I have spent way too much time with the Weird Laws app myself.  People who live in glass app houses should not cast stones, huh?  So, I am horrified to admit that I actually also think some weird laws should be repealed.  The only trouble is that Brownback is trying to politicize the control of any review of obsolete laws.

PS: This is an old law which should stay: In GA it’s illegal to start a false rumor.

  • VA Blogger

    You never really say why.

  • Teddy Goodson

    I get my best naps under the hair dryer, so I guess retirement in Florida out.