“Sideshow Bob” to Enter Republican Senate Race Against George Allen; Democrats Celebrate!

    484
    7

    Great news – if you’re a Democrat or named “Tim Kaine,” that is. 🙂

    Del. Robert G. Marshall, R-Prince William, will run for the U.S. Senate, he said today.

    Caught before a daily caucus meeting at the state Capitol, Marshall confirmed that he will enter the race, challenging former Gov. George Allen and three others for the Republican nomination.  

    “Yes,” he said simply when asked if he would officially announce in coming days.

    Why is this great news for Democrats? Let us count the ways:

    First, “Sideshow Bob” could actually beat Allen, resulting in an ideal, Christine “not a witch” O’Donnell scenario this coming November for Tim Kaine, Barack Obama, and other Democrats on the Virginia ballot.

    Second, even if “Sideshow Bob” doesn’t win, he will force Allen to expend resources and cover his far-far-far-right flank, both of which are VERY helpful to Virginia Democrats, first and foremost Tim Kaine.

    Third, “Sideshow Bob” will remind Virginians, day in and day out, how extreme Virginia Republicans can be. For instance, remember how when Marshall barely lost the 2008 Republican nomination battle to Jim Gilmore, and his supporters responded by shouting “baby killer!” at Gilmore and his supporters? Or, remember how Marshall wanted to bar gays from serving in the Virginia National Guard? How about his sponsorship of the anti-gay-marriage constitutional amendment (“Marshall-Newman”)? Then there’s Marshall’s crusades against the evil “cap and trade” (originally a conservative, market-based idea coming out of the Reagan and first Bush administrations) and individual mandate (also a conservative, Republican idea originally, part of “Romneycare” of course)? His opposition to “the IUD and pills” because supposedly “They don’t prevent ovulation and conception, they prevent implantation, which is abortion?” His belief that sometimes incest is voluntary, and that, with regard to rape, “the woman becomes a sin-bearer of the crime, because the right of a child predominates over the embarrassment of the woman.” His comparison of the economic recovery package to slavery (“It is as much a chain as ankle bracelets were as to African-Americans in the 1860s in this state. It’s just invisible. But it is a chain of death that we’re not going to escape.”)? His claim that Barack Obama’s “theme song” should be “live and let die” because of his supposedly “Suicidal deficits, enemies lists, abortion, euthanize seniors, health care that kills capitalism.” Yeah, totally cuckoo-for-cocoa-puffs, I know.

    Which is exactly why I say, run Sideshow Bob run! And please, Virginia Republican’ts, please nominate this guy. Really, he’d be a GREAT nominee for your party, I’m totally serious. 🙂