Back in the day, Republicans aimed to be as macho as Clint Eastwood – from his “make my day” era, that is, not his less noteworthy “talking to a chair” period. Today, a
better symbol of the GOP would be famously whiny
comedian Jon Lovitz (an Obama critic,
While I’m not exactly sure what the Republican platform is
these days, I know that it involves a lot of kvetching. The most recent presidential
debate was a veritable Whine Festival. The highlight may have been Ted Cruz’s outburst against the media,
for having the nerve to ask him a question about the budget. He responded to this outrage by outlining how
much reporters have oppressed him and his competitors to be Leader of the Free World.
Of course, complaining about the media is now a standard GOP
tactic, from Rand Paul fighting with female reporters who ask questions he doesn’t like to Donald Trump grousing about “gotcha” questions,
e.g., about the names of key foreign leaders.
Trump, of course, has made a career of bitching and moaning
and attacking and bad-mouthing others. Anytime anyone says a bad word about
him, the man wails like a banshee against his accuser. As Trump himself admitted, “I am the most fabulous whiner.”
But it’s not just the GOP’s “outsider” candidates who make a
career of whining. Poor little Marco Rubio
is just so “frustrated” with the Senate
that he’s decided not to show up for his job (though he seems okay with cashing
that fat, taxpayer-provided paycheck).
And Jeb! recently gave us the following remarkable soliloquy of self-pity]:
If this election is about how we’re going to fight to get nothing done, then I
don’t want anything — I don’t want any part of it. I don’t want to be elected
president to sit around and see gridlock just become so dominant that people
literally are in decline in their lives. That is not my motivation. I’ve got a
lot of really cool things I could do other than sit around, being miserable,
listening to people demonize me and feeling compelled to demonize them. That is
a joke. Elect Trump if you want that.
Aw, so sorry that people just don’t like you, Jeb.Maybe you should consider a more fitting
occupation, like, say, undertaker?
But neither is Republican whining limited to presidential
candidates.New House Speaker Paul Ryan
made his fellow GOP House members promise not to make him work too hard because “I cannot and I will not give up my family time.”Of course, Ryan has not been quite so
generous in granting family leave to those less fortunate than him.
Which is ultimately the key feature of today’s GOP whiners –
it’s all about THEM, about what poor little oppressed creatures they are – it’s
not about you or the state of the country or the world.You’re on your own, buddy.Just quit giving me, your leader, such a hard
It may be worth mentioning that, over on the Democratic
side, after Jim Webb whined about being ignored at the first debate, he was literally
laughed out of the party for it.Or that
Hillary Clinton recently endured 11 hours of not-very-friendly questioning by
the Benghazi Committee, with a relaxed smile, clear answers and nary a
Could it be that Republicans are in fact the party of
milquetoast, Mommy-pants wusses while Democrats are the party of tough-minded
bulldogs who focus on getting their jobs done?
I don’t know. But looking at our choices for president…I can’t complain.